“Total surrendering”
After taking a class on transitioning into careers, talking about grit and discipline, our instructor (a former ISEEDer, yay!) suggested that we take 12 hours without technology. At first it sounded very difficult, especially that I love listening to music. During that 12-hour period, one of the things I spent most time on was going through my old journals. It was very encouraging to revisit what I wrote as a seeker and as a new believer. One particular entry stood out. It is a prayer, “Total surrendering”, I prayed in 2015 when I started to get involve in ministry on my college campus. That was a few weeks after my first experience of sharing the gospel to a group of friends and one of them decided to profess Jesus as her personal Lord and savior. On the top of that I knew that I was being prepared to take over the leadership of our then fellowship group. Here is what I prayed:
“Lord Jesus, from now on I submit to your transformation, my old weaknesses are going away. I move from fear to boldness and confidence, from fearing/pleasing people to fearing and pleasing you oh my Lord of my life. I move from being shy to being open as I share your word, as I live a life of being a role model before others, by being a good daughter of you, being a mature and interactive young woman of God, as I set an example according to 1 Tim 4:12 in speech, in conduct, in faith, in purity. Lord remold me I surrender to you, do what you do in me.
Fill me with heavenly wisdom, love, faith and hope, and every other gifts and talents You placed in me, may they be known to me so that I use them for Your glory and accomplishing Your purpose on my life. May I be a good adviser, may I be a good counselor, may I be someone always ready to help others spiritually, physically, emotionally, financially, intellectually, and any other way according to your will, by help/guidance of the Holy Spirit Lord, may I be able to understand that something changing in my life would be a result from this transformation I’m praying for. May I be able to discern what is from you and make it happen in my life, live it out. May I bear fruit of the Spirit, may I be your intimate friend, may I always know your plans upon mine and others’ lives. I praise You for your love and faithfulness, mercy, forgiveness that endures forever, in the name of Jesus Christ of Nazareth, I pray, Amen!”
Now that I am transitioning to full-time ministry, what I believed then I still believe now that in order to do God’s work I need to submit and surrender all to Him. I am very thankful that the Lord heard my prayer, I have seen change, improvement, growth, etc. I am praying the same prayer today, and I am very confident that the Lord will continue His good work in me and through me, Amen!